Tag Archives: Loss

You Are Not Alone

19 Tuesday Feb 2013

Posted by in Christianity, Family, India, Inspiration, Prayer Request

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427905_288851894552101_801183559_nYesterday, I heard the sadness in the voice of my niece in India, even though it was her birthday.

“Are you sad, Shilpa?” I asked, over the phone.

“Yes, Auntie,” she answered, then her voice broke.

Shilpa lost her mother very suddenly a few months back and has had a few other setbacks in her life. She’s beautiful, so smart, and one of the loveliest persons that I know. We tried to get a VISA for her to come to the United States last year, but it was denied. It’s very difficult to get a VISA from India, though I pray that someday she can come here.

shilameI went to sleep after praying for Shilpa. In the early hours of the morning, I had a dream that I was in India with her. A song began to play and I hugged her and kissed the top of her head. Then, with the song still playing, I woke. I grabbed my iPhone and searched Youtube using the lyrics I heard in my dream.  Here it is:

Please pray for Shilpa, her future, and her family.

Christmas Challenge: Romans, Day 6 – Horrific Loss, Grief, and Comfort

14 Friday Dec 2012

Posted by in 16 Chapters to Christmas, Christianity, Inspiration, Prayers Needed

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Christmas Challenge: Romans, Chapter 6

Dead to Sin, Alive in Christ

Thanks for joining me on Day 6 of Deacon Alfred’s Challenge to read Romans: A chapter a day, each day, to Christmas. I’ll post the Chapter, then a short reflection at the end. Whether you are following every chapter, stopping by occasionally, or just reading this one time, I pray that God will bless you through His Word. Today, while considering what Paul is saying in Chapter 6, I’m reflecting on the horrific school shootings. I pray for the families of the victims and hope that somehow God’s word can ease the pain we all feel in our hearts at this unthinkable crime.

Here’s Romans: Chapter 6

6 What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? 2 By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? 3 Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4 We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.

5 For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we will certainly also be united with him in a resurrection like his. 6 For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin— 7 because anyone who has died has been set free from sin.

8 Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. 9 For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. 10 The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God.

11 In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. 12 Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. 13 Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness.14 For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace.

Slaves to Righteousness

15 What then? Shall we sin because we are not under the law but under grace? By no means! 16 Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? 17 But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you have come to obey from your heart the pattern of teaching that has now claimed your allegiance. 18 You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.

19 I am using an example from everyday life because of your human limitations. Just as you used to offer yourselves as slaves to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer yourselves as slaves to righteousness leading to holiness. 20 When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness. 21 What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death! 22 But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. 23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My thoughts: It’s very difficult to offer encouraging words, given the news about the school shooting in Connecticut. But, perhaps sin, death, hell, and the gift of eternal life are helpful topics to consider today.

Paul basically says that believers must die to sin and live to God. Because we are baptized in Christ, we have a union with Christ. We are alive to God and free from the dominion of sin. The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Regarding the school shootings, my first thought is a visual image of that man who shot those kids being grabbed by demons and dragged into hell like how it was done in the scene from Patrick Swayze’s movie, Ghost. But God is that young man’s judge, not me. On the other hand, maybe it’s better that we replace that image, with an image of the children who were killed, all together in Heaven, celebrating this Christmas with Jesus. Like this:

Jesus and Childfen

Or this:

jm_600_GIA.pd-P9.tiff

Maybe they get a real life look at the stable scene…

vintage_religious_christmas_nativity_baby_jesus_placemat-rf42a23c68a89449686a5c3c3b89843a0_2cfku_8byvr_512

white-jesus-001

For sure, Jesus will love them. Jesus will care for them. So, in my heart, I have comfort that Our Lord, Jesus will take care of those babies. The pain and suffering remains here on earth, in the hearts of their loved ones.

When I was fifteen, I lost my beloved six-year-old sister to a horrible death. Knowing I was losing it, a friend took me to church to talk to the pastor. I asked him questions about death and where my sister was.

I’ll never forget his words, “She’s with God, our Loving Father, and He’s the best caretaker there is.” Those words really helped me at a time when I thought I couldn’t go on. I had been her caretaker. I found comfort knowing she was okay, more than okay. I needed to hear that. So, I determined that if she was okay, then I would be okay, too. God helped me through those days, continued to be with me, and has never left me. I look forward to the day I see our Lord and my sweet sister Amy again.

Bringing Romans 6 back into this topic. Paul says, “Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness.14 For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace.”

We have been brought from death to life, everlasting life. Sin, whatever sin we struggle with, can not be our master. But it’s not a sin to grieve. Grieving is a God-given emotion. We should grieve and I pray that all those grieving the horrific loss of their child or loved one, will find comfort during their moments of grief. I pray God will soften the pain, give them strength to go on, and guide them closer to His heart.

Considering what Paul says to the Romans, even though we may struggle and suffer from the consequences of the horrible sins of others, we can’t let the sin of hate, guilt, anger, or whatever enter our hearts or turn us from God. These kinds of sins or any other sin, should not dominate our thoughts or lives. God didn’t make this happen. He gives humans free will. But God will deal with that shooter and all others who harm the innocent. The Bible assures us of that. As for us: We have been united with Christ in a death (He died for our sins) we shall be united with Him in resurrection (new life in Heaven).

On a final note: One day, while driving to the grocery store, my youngest son, Nick (four at the time), out of the blue asked me this question: “Mom, what happens when we die.” While I pondered, wondering about this profound question and how best to answer it to a preschooler, he said, “Never mind, Mom. I know. Jesus comes and takes our hand.” Bingo! That is an image I want to keep in my mind.

Jesus holds our hands now, during our difficult times and He will take all of our hands one day and lead us to verdant pastures. Let His Peace comfort us all now. Dear Father, in the Name of Jesus, please embrace the victims of this shooting into your loving arms. And, be with and bless each person who grieves the loss of a loved one during this Christmas season. Amen.

Christmas Challenge: Romans, Day 4

12 Wednesday Dec 2012

Posted by in 16 Chapters to Christmas, Christianity, Family, Football, Jake Byrne

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It’s Day 4 of Deacon Alfred Sturges’ challenge to read a chapter of Romans each day until Christmas. If you missed earlier chapters, you can find them on this blog under the category of 16 Chapters to Christmas. If you just want to join me for today, that’s fine, too. Here’s the chapter and below is my reflection.

Romans 4

New International Version (NIV)

Abraham Justified by Faith

What then shall we say that Abraham, our forefather according to the flesh, discovered in this matter? 2 If, in fact, Abraham was justified by works, he had something to boast about—but not before God. 3 What does Scripture say? “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness.”

4 Now to the one who works, wages are not credited as a gift but as an obligation. 5 However, to the one who does not work but trusts God who justifies the ungodly, their faith is credited as righteousness. 6 David says the same thing when he speaks of the blessedness of the one to whom God credits righteousness apart from works:

7 “Blessed are those
    whose transgressions are forgiven,
    whose sins are covered.
8 Blessed is the one
    whose sin the Lord will never count against them.”

9 Is this blessedness only for the circumcised, or also for the uncircumcised? We have been saying that Abraham’s faith was credited to him as righteousness. 10 Under what circumstances was it credited? Was it after he was circumcised, or before? It was not after, but before! 11 And he received circumcision as a sign, a seal of the righteousness that he had by faith while he was still uncircumcised. So then, he is the father of all who believe but have not been circumcised, in order that righteousness might be credited to them. 12 And he is then also the father of the circumcised who not only are circumcised but who also follow in the footsteps of the faith that our father Abraham had before he was circumcised.

13 It was not through the law that Abraham and his offspring received the promise that he would be heir of the world, but through the righteousness that comes by faith. 14 For if those who depend on the law are heirs, faith means nothing and the promise is worthless, 15 because the law brings wrath.And where there is no law there is no transgression.

16 Therefore, the promise comes by faith, so that it may be by grace and may be guaranteed to all Abraham’s offspring—not only to those who are of the law but also to those who have the faith of Abraham. He is the father of us all. 17 As it is written: “I have made you a father of many nations.” He is our father in the sight of God, in whom he believed—the God who gives life to the dead and calls into being things that were not.

18 Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, “So shall your offspring be.” 19 Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead—since he was about a hundred years old—and that Sarah’s womb was also dead. 20 Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, 21 being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. 22 This is why “it was credited to him as righteousness.” 23 The words “it was credited to him” were written not for him alone, 24 but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness—for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead. 25 He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.

My thoughts: Still traveling today, on the way to Saint Gabriel’s Anglican Church in Greeley, Colorado for another Our Lady of Guadalupe Mass. Here’s my reflection on  Romans 4:

Back to the circumcision, Abraham was “justified” before his circumcision, so again, I’m understanding that matters of faith go deeper than circumcision, works, or other rituals. It comes down to faith. Abraham, it is said, had nothing to boast in the presence of God, but being saved by grace, through faith. Abraham is the spiritual forefather of all believers, an example of obedient faith.

Being a mom, I’ve always struggled with the thought of Abraham being able to obediently follow God to the point of offering his own child. But, I certainly understand the need for our faith to be so submissive to God’s will, that we are able to say (and truly mean), “Okay Lord. I’m offering this situation to You in total faith. May Your Will be done.”

I remember my first real grown-up prayer like that. It was a result of waking up on blood-soaked sheets, cramping in pain. I was three months pregnant. After being admitted in the hospital, the doctor affirmed I was miscarrying. I argued with God. He created me with a super strong maternal nature. I already loved this baby. Why was he taking my first child away? I wanted to be a mom more than anything.

It took one word from a sweet nurse (or maybe she was an angel) to change my argumentative prayers and hopeless wailing into a humble prayer of submission; Hope. The nurse had said, “always have hope.” That was it.

I pondered on that word, then realized that hope meant giving a hopeless situation to God and trusting in the outcome, no matter what the outcome might be. I was scared, sad, and alone in that hospital. I lifted my heart to God and gave the situation to Him completely and wholeheartedly, by some grace. I dedicated the baby to God, placing my unborn, but already loved child in His hands. I prayed, “Whatever the outcome, Lord, I trust that it will be Your will. I trust You completely. Though I will be sad if I miscarry, I will understand that it was Your decision. This baby is Yours Lord.”

Immediately after my Amen, total peace washed over me. The bleeding ceased. I heard my baby’s heartbeat for the first time. The medical staff was shocked. (I never again saw that angelic nurse who seemed more concerned about my emotional and spiritual health than my physical health.)

Here’s that baby: jakecute

The outcome of that prayer was fantastic. Jake is a wonderful son and I’m thankful to God for him and for my other two children, Nick and Betsy. I found peace in that moment because I’d submitted this child to God in faith and let go, trusting that only God could help me. God made a decision. It was good. But, I also know the flip-side of the same situation.

A few years after Jake was born, I had a miscarriage. I’d offered a similar prayer and dedicated that baby to the Lord. I also experienced a profound sense of peace with this outcome. I accepted in faith, that this child returned to the Lord. I don’t know why it happened like that. I left it with God. I’ve suffered other great losses and pain in my life, but I trust that God, our Loving Father is always in control. He has given me a profound sense of peace through everything.

Though the rituals (Baptism, Confirmation, etc.) are outward signs of inward grace, making us new creatures in Christ, our complete submissive faith in God in all situations, is what I believe makes us righteousness before God.  And of course, doing good “works” would be the natural result of being a Christian, though I don’t believe we are justified by the merits of our own works.

Reading Scripture, (thanks for this challenge Deacon Alfred) helps me understand the promises of Christ, and hold to them through everything.

The last line of this chapter says it all: “He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.”

So, we are not justified by the merit of our own works, but by faith in Jesus Christ and his righteousness. We have salvation because of Jesus Christ. Through His death and passion, he paid our debt, discharged us from the guilt and punishment of all our sins. Thanks be to God.

Book Review: My Emily by Matt Patterson

20 Tuesday Mar 2012

Posted by in Books, Christianity, Inspiration, Weekly Book Review

≈ 8 Comments

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“My Emily wasn’t born perfect – or so one might think. She was born with Down Syndrome and many would jump to the immediate conclusion that she would have very little hope for a life with any significance. Two years later came the devastating diagnosis of leukemia. What little hope remaining turned to no hope whatsoever – or so one might think.” Matt Patterson, author of My Emily

Holly Michael’s Review of My Emily: The Apostle John, at the end of John 21:25 writes: “Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written.”

You can almost hear John’s sigh because he realizes his inadequacy as a writer to put down the words that could possibly tell the whole story of Christ, His miracles, and His love for humanity. I feel like John, after reading My Emily, written by Emily’s father, Matt Patterson. Words are inadequate to give this book a review it deserves.

So I say this: Read it. Next to the Bible, it will be one of the most powerful books you will ever read.

After I read My Emily, I imagined a scene in Heaven, before Emily came to earth. It goes like this: God’s new creation, an adorable golden-haired little beauty, stands before her Heavenly Father with the light and love of The Creator reflecting in her almond-shaped blue eyes. She’s one of the special beings He’s created with a heart that has the highest capacity to love, and a heartwarming never-ending smile. I imagine Emily giving her yes, her fiat, to a mission to leave Heaven for just a little while, to be born into a particular family, to touch their hearts and lives and forever change them, as well as leave behind a legacy that will bless humanity.

Then I imagine Emily says, “But how will I reach so many people in such a short time? How will so many come to know about this truth, wisdom, and love that you want me to carry to them?”

Then I imagine God says, “I’ve already sent one ahead of you and blessed him with a special gift for writing. I’ve been preparing him.”

“Who is this one?” Emily asks.

“He is your father on earth and he will love you as I love you.”

At this time, only God and Emily know the whole story. We creatures on earth are jaded, confused, selfish creatures, having lost the innocence of childhood and knowledge of Heaven and of truth and God. We forget once we arrive on this treacherous planet. Life deals us tough blows. We fail to understand God’s mercy and grace. We are no longer tuned into the wisdom of God, as a child like Emily is. That’s why the Bible says you must be like little children to enter into the Kingdom of God. God and Emily know the truth.

And then brave Emily, knowing, like Jesus, she will also suffer pain on earth, comes to a special family: The Pattersons.

This is the story I imagine; the story before the story that Matt Patterson so eloquently shares about his daughter, Emily, diagnosed with Down Syndrome. Though the world may not see her as a blessing, the Pattersons embrace her as a gift from Heaven. The story doesn’t stop there. Matt (a newspaper editor in the Air Force) and his family, two years later, must courageously endure a battle with Emily’s diagnosis of Leukemia, a disease that threatens to steal her from them.

Matt Patterson, in My Emily, says, “He perhaps sent this little, unassuming angel to instruct me and many others about what’s truly important in life.”

I, too, believe that Emily was sent by God to teach us about hope and love. My baby sister, Amy, also diagnosed with Down Syndrome, was loved and she loved back in greater measure. Like Emily, she left our family too soon. But, oh, the lessons she left behind.

Like the lessons Amy taught me, the lessons in this little book are deep and meaningful. My Emily is a story about joy and sadness, hope and courage, and above all, about love.

You fall in love with Emily. You weep with Matt and his family through their grief. You get out your highlighter, and highlight nearly every line in the book. And as soon as you finish reading this little book you will want to read it all over again. And you will.

Matt, shares this, near the end of the book: “Now that I have had time to look back, I realize that God was kind to patiently wait for me to see the full blessing of Emily’s life just as He planned it. And while I slandered Him, He led me toward healing.”

So who is this book for?

To begin with, it’s for:

  • Those who have lost a child or loved one.
  • A parent of a Down Syndrome child, or parent of any special needs child.
  • Anyone suffering grief or dealing with a child who is suffering.
  • Those who want to know how to pray in the midst of suffering, and how to draw closer to the Heart of God, through all things.
  • Those who raise their fists toward Heaven and cry, “Why?”

This list is just a beginning. Not only is My Emily for suffering souls, it’s for everyone, especially those who ask questions; the seekers of truth and knowledge of the meaning of life.

This book will change your life. It’s filled with lessons of love, brought by Emily, given by our Creator, our Father in Heaven, who is Love.

*A portion of the proceeds of the book, My Emily, will be donated to the My Emily Foundation which partners with organizations and individuals to assist extraordinary families with special needs children, those who are battling pediatric cancers, as well as parents who are grieving the loss of a little one. You can learn more about The My Emily Foundation and contribute at www.myemily.org.

Click here to purchase My Emily through Amazon.com

Book Review: My Emily by Matt Patterson

20 Tuesday Mar 2012

Posted by in Books, Christianity, Inspiration, Weekly Book Review

≈ 31 Comments

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“My Emily wasn’t born perfect – or so one might think.  She was born with Down Syndrome and many would jump to the immediate conclusion that she would have very little hope for a life with any significance. Two years later came the devastating diagnosis of leukemia. What little hope remaining turned to no hope whatsoever – or so one might think.” Matt Patterson, author of My Emily

Holly Michael’s Review of My Emily: The Apostle John, at the end of John 21:25 writes: “Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written.”

You can almost hear John’s sigh because he realizes his inadequacy as a writer to put down the words that could possibly tell the whole story of Christ, His miracles, and His love for humanity. I feel like John, after reading My Emily, written by Emily’s father, Matt Patterson. Words are inadequate to give this book a review it deserves.

So I say this: Read it. Next to the Bible, it will be one of the most powerful books you will ever read.

After I read My Emily, I imagined a scene in Heaven, before Emily came to earth. It goes like this: God’s new creation, an adorable golden-haired little beauty, stands before her Heavenly Father with the light and love of The Creator reflecting in her almond-shaped blue eyes. She’s one of the special beings He’s created with a heart that has the highest capacity to love, and a heartwarming never-ending smile. I imagine Emily giving her yes, her fiat, to a mission to leave Heaven for just a little while, to be born into a particular family, to touch their hearts and lives and forever change them, as well as leave behind a legacy that will bless humanity.

Then I imagine Emily says, “But how will I reach so many people in such a short time? How will so many come to know about this truth, wisdom, and love that you want me to carry to them?”

Then I imagine God says, “I’ve already sent one ahead of you and blessed him with a special gift for writing. I’ve been preparing him.”

“Who is this one?” Emily asks.

“He is your father on earth and he will love you as I love you.”

At this time, only God and Emily know the whole story. We creatures on earth are jaded, confused, selfish creatures, having lost the innocence of childhood and knowledge of Heaven and of truth and God. We forget once we arrive on this treacherous planet. Life deals us tough blows. We fail to understand God’s mercy and grace. We are no longer tuned into the wisdom of God, as a child like Emily is. That’s why the Bible says you must be like little children to enter into the Kingdom of God. God and Emily know the truth.

And then brave Emily, knowing, like Jesus, she will also suffer pain on earth, comes to a special family: The Pattersons.

This is the story I imagine; the story before the story that Matt Patterson so eloquently shares about his daughter, Emily, diagnosed with Down Syndrome. Though the world may not see her as a blessing, the Pattersons embrace her as a gift from Heaven. The story doesn’t stop there. Matt (a newspaper editor in the Air Force) and his family, two years later, must courageously endure a battle with Emily’s diagnosis of Leukemia, a disease that threatens to steal her from them.

Matt Patterson, in My Emily, says, “He perhaps sent this little, unassuming angel to instruct me and many others about what’s truly important in life.”

I, too, believe that Emily was sent by God to teach us about hope and love. My baby sister, Amy, also diagnosed with Down Syndrome, was loved and she loved back in greater measure. Like Emily, she left our family too soon. But, oh, the lessons she left behind.

Like the lessons Amy taught me, the lessons in this little book are deep and meaningful. My Emily is a story about joy and sadness,  hope and courage, and above all, about love.

You fall in love with Emily. You weep with Matt and his family through their grief. You get out your highlighter, and highlight nearly every line in the book. And as soon as you finish reading this little book you will want to read it all over again. And you will.

Matt, shares this, near the end of the book: “Now that I have had time to look back, I realize that God was kind to patiently wait for me to see the full blessing of Emily’s life just as He planned it. And while I slandered Him, He led me toward healing.”

So who is this book for?

To begin with, it’s for:

  • Those who have lost a child or loved one.
  • A parent of a Down Syndrome child, or parent of any special needs child.
  • Anyone suffering grief or dealing with a child who is suffering.
  • Those who want to know how to pray in the midst of suffering, and how to draw closer to the Heart of God, through all things.
  • Those who raise their fists toward Heaven and cry, “Why?”

This list is just a beginning. Not only is My Emily for suffering souls, it’s for everyone, especially those who ask questions; the seekers of truth and knowledge of the meaning of life.

This book will change your life. It’s filled with lessons of love, brought by Emily, given by our Creator, our Father in Heaven, who is Love.

*A portion of the proceeds of the book, My Emily, will be donated to the My Emily Foundation which partners with organizations and individuals to assist extraordinary families with special needs children, those who are battling pediatric cancers, as well as parents who are grieving the loss of a little one. You can learn more about The My Emily Foundation and contribute at www.myemily.org.

Click here to purchase My Emily through Amazon.com